The girl with a stained past- Pt1
I recall in 2002, Rhema bible church had their school ministry team visit our school for a whole week. They spoke of Jesus and giving your life to Christ, but somehow I didn’t quite get it and felt it was for those who did not go to church and are not Christian. I went to church occasionally so they were not speaking to me. All I was focusing on was the handsome boys the ministry team came with and wanted to get their numbers. I did get some guy’s number, and he was cool and all, but everything he spoke about was my relationship with Jesus. Little did I know that he was concerned about my soul when I was concerned about going on a date with him. Months later, we lost contact and I never heard from him again.
It was in my late teens when I stopped going to church. There was no excitement about going to church and felt it was not relevant to me. However, I always prayed. This is one discipline I held dear to my life, even though my prayers never exceeded 3minutes. By the time I finished Grade 12, Church on Sundays was a farfetched thought. I became a Christian who only went to church on Easter weekend. Except that, I was either working, or had a hangover.
I became a party animal. Weekend party schedule was asked from me. I did everything from clubbing to house parties. House parties were huge back in those times and I knew where the party was. I partied from the most expensive clubs in the north to the least club scenes for varsity students. I worked hard and drank even harder. As much as I did all these, I had boundaries, that reflecting at them now, one realises how God was always protecting me. I did it all except for drugs. I knew with my competitive personality, if I did something, I always did it with excellence, therefore I knew if I ever took drugs, it would have been the end of me. I baked space cookies and planned trips and parties. I was the IT girl. And then all of a sudden, things started looking different…
I remember it was end of October 2009, when I sat in my then boyfriend’s place and I realised, I don’t love this guy. I recall he had invited me to a London trip, and I was excited for months, but somehow decided I don’t want to go. As much as life was starting to feel rather strange, I felt I was losing my touch. I didn’t want to go out anymore. When I did, the next day I would feel so convicted. Something was happening but I couldn’t put my finger as to what was really going on.
On the 19th of December 2009, my cousin was getting married. There was something about her wedding. It was pure and holy and she looked so happy and whole. I admired her purity. I wanted what she had and I remember sitting at reception looking at her and thinking “Lord, I want what she has.” That wedding was different. The next day, which was the 20th of December 2009, I woke up and prayed the sinner’s prayer of salvation. I asked God to change my life and I want to live for Him now. And that is how I received Jesus as my Lord and Saviour.
I texted every contact on my phone to let them know I am born again and have fully devoted my life to God. My best friend sent me a few scriptures on salvation. Reading the word of God became so different, it was as though my spirit understood the words in the bible and related them to my soul. It was so refreshing.
My then boyfriend was in London at the time. I spoke to him over the phone and told him he needs to be saved, it is the best feeling ever. I remember how disappointed I was when he told me he had been saved for five years already. I was more disappointed that not once has he ever shared Jesus with me. I knew then, he’s not going to be the guy I spend the rest of my life with.
I was on fire for God. I was radical for God. I wanted to listen to gospel music all day and night. I wanted to stay home and cook (when cooking was never my strong chore in my party phase). I changed and my mom loved the change in me. I was invited to a home cell and in two weeks attending, the leader prayed for me to receive the gift of praying in tongues. I still went to my old church, yet attended the home cells of Grace Bible Church. I was then invited to attend one of their services one Sunday. At first I didn’t want to go. My excuse was, it’s a mega church, and I don’t want to be a number. I remember my friend’s reply so crystal clear, he said “If you don’t want to be a number, then get involved! Serve at church.”
That was it. I visited Grace Bible Church. The level of excellence for a black church, and the uncompromised teaching of the word blew me away. I wanted to be part of that church and I knew I would grow spiritually.
Through my journey, I kept wondering how I knew the Lord ’s Prayer when I have never heard it. How did I know what to say??
The answer is people prayed for me. My gran was one of the people that always prayed for my salvation. But what also strike me was this:
In 2013, I was attending Rhema evening service. They had a special service where they were interviewing the young adults’ pastors and asking them to share their salvation testimonies. As I sat there listening to one of the pastors, he said “I got saved and left a paying job to join in Bible College. I remember for a while I did school ministry, but I still didn’t know what exactly God wanted to do with me. I didn’t know why I was doing it, but I was part of the team so I did it.” And suddenly, my spirit recognised the pastor. He was the same guy who always asked about my relationship with God back in 2002, and said he was praying for me, when I was all canal about it.
See, everything in God happens for a reason. You don’t just coincidentally meet people for the fun of it. There is always a reason. I was reminded of the scripture in the book of Corinthians “According to God’s grace that was given to me, as a skilled master builder I have laid a foundation, and another builds on it. But each one must be careful how he builds on it, because no one can lay any other foundation than what has been laid- that is Jesus Christ.” He was at work even when I didn’t have any idea! Never take for granted how God can use you to minister to others. He is always concerned about mankind.
Salvation is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Getting the revelation of who Jesus is in my life has been the best thing. I realised I had a void that needed to be filled and, it could only be filled by Him. God cares about every single detail of your life. He has people praying for you for every need, and will make sure you discover your own revelation of who He is and draw closer to Him.