What do you wish you knew when you were 21 that you know now

This time last year, I attended the annual Rhema women’s conference and during their panel discussion, different women were asked “What do you wish you knew at 21 that you know now?” Wise women who were on the panel discussion answered, but one reply left me evaluating my own life. Quoting Dr Mpofu “I wish I knew for wrong things to happen, things don’t have to be wrong. God does not waste pain. I went to Namibia. The hotel we were in was in the middle of nowhere in the dessert, and I concentrated on the desolate dessert where there was no rain. That night as we sat outside, the sky was so beautiful, the stars were so clear and so close. God said to me, I created rain, and it is me who chooses where there will be rain. I chose for rain not to be here, and look how you are enjoying the beauty of the dessert. Check in your life where you are expecting me to bring rain, when I have chosen that there shouldn’t be any.”
I asked my lady friends the same question, these are the lessons they shared. Enjoy and always value yourself woman!
Nthabeleng: It’s okay to fail. Failure points to God. Sometimes God allows failure so that we can recognise that our successes are not the result of our ingenuity but, His grace. Failure brings us face to face with the Almighty.


 Tshepo: I wish I knew how to use money.

Ayanda: The importance of having a job that satisfies you and is in line with your purpose.  


Faith Nthoba: I learned that sex out of marriage is not fashionable, but breeds unnecessary toxic soul ties.


Tinyiko: Eating healthy and exercising is a good investment.

Thembisile: The one thing I really wish I knew then that I know now is the power of investing money.

Mosidi: To never compromise on your values for the sake of others and never settle.


Tsholofelo: I wish I knew it’s okay to be young and enjoy your youth. Being a young mother, you turn to be too independent and miss out. In essence, I wish I knew I could start over as it’s never too late.


Zime: I wish I knew how important it is to pay attention to the choices I make and my actions as they determine how my life turns out.

Boitumelo: That I am more than enough, even with the broken pieces, I am and have always been whole.

Gomotsegang: Forgiveness sets you free, so do it sooner and learn to let go.

Temogo: I wish I knew that every choice I make has a consequence, and some of the choices leave a permanent consequence. Somehow, I thought this only applied when I am old enough, but realised late that the choices I made when I was able to make a choice still had a consequence. It’s a principle. Same as what you sow, you reap. It applies to everyone, young or old.

Thuli: To trust my instinct, and trust the Holy Spirit in me. He never lets me down.

Itumeleng: I wish I knew that self-love and self-appreciation is the best thing one can do for themselves.  

 Faith: I wish I knew the importance and the value of staying true to myself. 


Botshelo: Just because you had a mother and saw her being a wife, it doesn’t always mean you will automatically be a good mother and wife. Somethings are just not common sense.


Thobani: Education will open doors, don’t stop studying.
Sibongile: That I am beautiful and fine the way I am.

Zipporah: I wish I knew the importance of getting a driver’s licence earlier in my 20s.


Diamond: Not all of my friends will be happy when my dreams come true.

Madidimalo: To trust God without borders.



  1. No matter where I am. No matter what I am facing. I should step out in faith. Put my toes in the water. He is with me all the time.

  2. Wow! Beautiful article. It's amazing how many different things matter to all of us and how we see things differently.

  3. It was very interesting to reading all the messages. We serve and faithful God, a God of second chance. I don't regret anything I have been through in life because there's a lesson in every mistake. May God give us strength to move forward as we continue to correct the past mistakes.

    God bless you all

  4. Wow this is Beautiful...truly inspired!


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