The forbidden fruit type ' a guy

You probably wondering which type does this guy fall under and is he worth getting in love with?this is the dream guy,the guy whose just so perfect in every way or so we think. The one you've secretly admired without him knowing he's your dream guy. 

The guy fits your preference as if you had met him when you took time to write down your preferences in a man. 

I remember meeting this type of guy. First glance,I thought "Lord,I didn't know you still created such work of art" I mean he was tall;bold shoulders;perfect set of teeth; nice head shape with neatly shaven hair cut. His hands were so clean and not dry at all between the fingers. Its clear he takes good care of himself. 

"He looks good on the outside, he only appeals to the 5 senses. Smells good (that after he's given you a hug,you smell his cologne on you) looks good as if he's staying with a female figure who irons and gives him style tips on how to dress every morning,I mean he's so stylish, I didn't get to taste him but I imagined myself singing Beyonce's song for him and dancing for him on the night of our honeymoon. His tongue, what a visionary!a focused man,the type I'd be proud to be a priest of my home and take orders from any day.  BUT! He doesn't connect with the inner-Man!

The forbidden guy is that guy who you've always wanted but knew you can never have,because there's no way you can be in his league! A guy like him doesn't look like the type that goes for a woman like you Huh!you know God answers prayers but here you're just trying your luck to think he even notices you!

And then... One day,unexpectedly,he asks you for your number. Still head over heels that you have his number and can chat to him anytime,he leaves you in awe when he asks you out for dinner! Every woman whose been in this situation knows how to do the happy dance of answered prayers!!!lol,you find yourself doing it. 

Shocking that he goes for your type,you still amazed how he moved fast from chatting with you and a week later asking you on a date. "A man who knows what he wants is your kind of man" So you keep thinking

The guy tends to entice you,I mean after the whole fairy tale that took place,he distances himself so you start doing the chasing. You realise that's not how you pictured it to be but there's no formula to how people end up being spouses so its okay to initiate. Yes,you're right,its okay to initiate but not initiate a conversation everyday,and even when you called or text first,he still ends the conversation. Rude as that may be,you are holding on to the perfect picture in your mind and it keeps you going. 

The painful part is unconsciously chasing after this handsome man who you somehow want his approval. How he responds determines the changes you make on yourself and the list you always refer to in your thoughts. 
Remember your prayer, "Lord,the day he asks me out,I'll say what took you so long. Can I just get to know this gentle brother?please!that's all I'm asking for".
Months later, you realise God answered your prayer while you took time to know him, his character is not the one you would want to spend the rest of your life with. "But God is a God of many chances,so why are you behaving like you are perfect?"  (Another voice in your head whispers that). You choose to stick around when he's not even aware you are around. 

He's all that in a bag of Lays chips. One thing about these guys is,they know they are all that,so as they pursue you, you have to play your part in pursuing them as well. They want to be chased. How silly!

I don't know about you but I've had an encounter with this fruit. He really was everything but there were signs,signs I just could not shake off,but still... I held on to the picture in my thoughts that has kept me going even before he noticed me, the perfect picture that makes a perfect family; the perfect picture that even looks good when people view us together on the outside. A match from heaven. He was and still an amazing man. I just couldn't shake off the warning signs,the subtle warning signs that were clear are his weaknesses but he was not planning to do anything about them. 

Its so devastating that some have married this type of guy, hoping he would change. Its so sad that we find excuses for this handsome man, for we want to marry soon that we are willing to marry those we love more than they love us. 

"You will know them by their fruits,that is,by the way they act"

You will know him by his character if he's really worth your time. My prayer is for God to guard your heart, that you may be able to discern whether its God's Spirit speaking or if its your thoughts screaming louder, that you think its God saying "He's the one"  

"Judge me not by physical size or appearance, but judge me by the size of my character."

The reality is,you might not marry the man of your dreams,the perfect hunk you've made him to be,and if you choose not to marry him, you also might not be married for another year or more. God gives us our hearts desires,yet our desired can be made out from fleshy desires that make us fall out of God's best plan for us. He has your best interests at heart and He looks at 10, 20, 40 years from now. Trust Him with your future!Trust your conscience...that is, your innerMAN!


  1. I like it. very much! well done Temo.

  2. Great work Temo, true well written...I've been there not long ago!!!! and u know what the best place one can be is in the hands


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